The Curious Case of Caroline Charlotte Veasey Dawson - (Part One)

Recently, while looking for something else entirely, I came across an account of the unfortunate suicide of a women, who seemed to have a mysterious past. As I read the account, I found myself completely wrapped up in this fascinating story. As you will see, from the account which I will share with you below, Caroline Charlotte was a fascinating woman, an author and artist, who wrote extremely movingly about her struggles in life. 

I was desperate to find out more about her. I googled her, but could find almost no mention of her online. I'm hoping that by sharing this here, I'll be able to connect with people who know more, or who can find out more. If nothing else, I hope that it leads to Caroline's poem being read by a wider audience, because I think it's beautiful. 

Fortunately the sad account of her death has many details which have allowed me to explore further, which I will share soon. But first, here is the account of Caroline Charlotte's death. 

WARNING: This account features details of suicide and a fairly graphic description of an autopsy. 

I obtained this from two newspapers, 'Liverpool Mercury, Tuesday 2nd December 1851' and 'Leicester Chronicle, Saturday 29th November 1851'. The article originated in the Leicester Chronicle and was then copied into the Liverpool Mercury. 

The transcription is my own, any spelling mistakes or other errors are likely my fault. I've tried to copy the format as it originally appeared in the paper, however I've added in paragraph breaks where the original didn't, as it just makes it that bit easier to read!

Extraordinary case of suicide by a Lady in LEICESTER

A most melancholy suicide happened in this place on Friday evening, the 21st inst, which was no parallel, in our recollection, in this town or county. The victim of self-murder in this case was a lady by birth, connection, taste and literary accomplishment; though she was destitute of pecuniary means. She has lately been attempting to gain a livelihood by the sale of printed poems, in this town and elsewhere; and appears to have been a virtuous, refined and gifted female, but possessed of overwrought sensibility. Her domestic history has been peculiarly unhappy; and recently her prospects were painful and discouraging, if not such as to create despair. She has been lodging in Upper Hill-street, Humberston-gate, where she had won the good opinion of the person with whom she lived, and she betrayed no symptoms of her cherishing the purpose of self-murder, even to the last moment when she was spoken to. At last she lifted the poison to her lips, and was next seen a corpse. Her name was Caroline Charlotte Veasey Gilldea.  

The inquest was held at Fountain Tavern on Saturday evening, before John Gregory Esq and the following jury - 

Jury members listed

The jury was sworn in and then went to view the body, which was that of a female of forty, rather good looking, and with a disposition to fullness of figure. Her hair was brown and braided over her forehead. Her features were regular and well-marked, and her complexion was florid. She bore the traces of having been in her earlier days, a fine looking woman. 

On the return of the jury from the examination of the corpse, the evidence to be adduced was taken. The first was that of Mrs Cobbin, the person with whom the deceased had lodged. We give it without further preface :-

I am a widow and live at No. 11 Hill-street, in the parish of St Margaret. The deceased lived at my house. She came three weeks last Thursday. She was quite a stranger to me and she told me she had never been in Leicester before. She appeared to be a very excellent scholar, and hard written, I believe, many books. She had but very little property she told me, when she came, and she went round to several gentleman in Leicester selling her books, by which I believe, she maintained herself. Her health appeared to be very good. Yesterday morning when she came down, she said she was going to call on Mr Vanghan, and she went out after ten o’clock, and returned about eleven, and seemed very much disappointed at not having seen him, he being on a journey. She went up into her own room, and I saw nothing of her till the evening about six, when she came down, and asked me for a halfpenny candle, which she said would last her that night, as she should not write much more. I let her have it. She seemed much as usual and I did not see any difference in her. She went up again and I saw her no more till about half-past nine. At that time I heard a great moaning, and on listening I found it to come from the deceased’s room, and I went up to it and I first called at the door, but receiving no answer I opened it, and went in, and I found the deceased lying on the bed. I spoke to her several times, and touched her, but the deceased never spoke nor stirred. 

I went and called in a neighbour (Mrs Dilkes) who went with me up stairs to deceased’s room. She was still in the same state. Mrs Dilkes then went to fetch Mr. Dent, a surgeon, but he did not come, being from home, and then went to the Dispensary, and afterwards for Mr. Buck, who was the first surgeon who came. When I first went up, I saw a tea cup and a bottle standing together on the dressing table, which is very near the bed. They were both empty. Mr Buck took the bottle. Two gentleman only had called upon her since she had been with me - the Rev. Mr Harrison and Mr Dare. I never perceived the deceased to vary much in her spirts, since she was with me. She was apparently very cheerful. 

The next testimony adduced was that of Mr. Buck, the surgeon, who deposed to the state in which he found the body of the deceased, and to finding papers evidently arranged carefully on the table in her bed-room, all evincing a degree of deliberation and mental composure truly surprising. He said - 
I was called to the deceased last night about a quarter past ten. I went immediately, and found her lying upon her bed in the position which she occupied when the jury saw her this evening. Her breathing was laborious and at long intervals. She was conscious, I believe, of her state, but could not speak. There was a very perceptible odour of prussic acid vapour in the room, and I immediately  put into operation the stomach pump, and injected and drew back again a considerable quantity of warm water, which smelt slightly of prussic acid. I also administer some ammonia, but the remedies appeared to have no effect upon her. She rapidly became weaker, and died in about ten minutes after I got to her. 

I found some papers lying open and in order, upon the dressing table. They are the same as I now produce, except there parcels, which were each addressed to Mr Dare, and which were delivered to that gentleman. There was also a cap, trimmed with black, upon the table, which I left there. The parcels or letters addressed to Mr Dare were each in a black envelope, and sealed with black. There was also a bottle and tea-cup upon the table, the former of which I now produce. It contains now a small quantity of a mixture of almond flavour and essential oil of almonds. I have this afternoon made a post-mortem examination of the body aof the deceased. The appearance of the body was that of a person in good healthy. There was a great quantity of external as well as internal fat. On opening the body, I found the heart, lungs and abdominal viscera all healthy. THe venous system, as is usually in all cases of pointing from prussic acid, was much congested. The stomach, which was inflamed on its inner surface, contained about half-a-pint of half-digested farinaeceous food, and emmitted some slight odour like that of essential oil of almonds. I have no doubt but that her death has been occasioned by the drinking of some similar fluid to that still remaining in the bottle, which is of a very poisonous nature.

This is the whole of Mr Buck’s testimony. The Coroner her read the papers found in the deceased’s bed-room. One was a diary she had kept for several days preceding; another was a note to Mr Dare in which she addresses him believing him to “posses a benevolent heart” and requests hm to attend her funeral, concluding with trifling presents to Mr Dare’s family, and with asking the performance of one or two friendly offices. She also desires not to be buried in consecrated ground. These documents are written in a clear, firm, and lady-like hand, and in a style, literary, and grammatical, at once correct and polished. Of these we publish the following, which posses a touching and thrilling interest :-

“November 21, 1851, half-past four o’clock, pm. I have now concluded my last earthly repast and thus consumed every atom of food I possessed. My feelings are serene and content beyond expression.

“From my childhood I have never been like other persons. In waking dreams and in a species of trance, I have, as it were, frequently commingled with a higher order of intelligent beings than earth can produce. I have met with strange people, and seen very strange sights; have traveled thought many lands as well as my own native country (America). I have always felt a conviction that I should not die as other persons did, and never had the least fear of death; neither do I feel any dread of it now.

“It seems to me that I am (almost unknown to myself in the manner of it) connected by some inexplicable link with the Freemasons. I have stringent reasons for this opinion. My father I know was one. I have several times seen and conversed with him, though he assumed a different form and name since his apparent death.”

“Most uncommon spiritual revelations have frequently been mine. I have had a sore battle with the world, without any guide and protector; since my father’s (apparent) death; for my second marriage was, indeed, a truly unfortunate one.

“There are very many things I know of a spiritual nature which I dare not reveal. In another world I am convinced I shall enjoy great happiness, and see all things gradually as they really are.

“Knowledge I have ever sought to acquire. How glorious it will be to be able to grasp it in all its ramifications in an eternal Hereafter! Half the dull, plodding, senseless people of earth never think on, much less can they comprehend, what is meant by God, Heaven and Eternity. 

“Of all the badly-governed countries on the earth, England and her dependencies are certainly the worst. There is one law for the rich - another  for the poor. Her taxes, her aristocracy and her royal family, are ruinous to the nation at large. A better regulated system must and will be followed, as her people become more educated - consequently more enlightened and refined. 

“What a life have I led for some years, amongst a class who could not enter into, or understand, one of my feelings; The want of money prevented my mixing with my own grade in society, and I was completely as it were shut up in myself. 

“Intellect is glorious, a Gold-like gift; but in England it is nothing without money.

“My late, dear, VERY, VERY, dear friend Lady Combermere committed suicide. How often, when conversing with her at the Royal Hospital (Dublin), has a secret voice whispered to me that our deaths should be similar!  Although, at that time, I had not formed an idea what sort of death she should die. 

“Strange this presentiment! How different is her daughter, Lady Downshire to her. She has no heart. Most people on earth are so selfish. They cannot feel for others. Unfortunately for me, I ever felt too much for misery or suffering in any for; even if the persons were depraved and wicked ; - yes, and though they were my enemies, I could not bear to see them suffer. 

“Even when my son robbed me, after all my painful and weary exertions to forward him in the world, my heart frequently bled to reflect that I had not it in my power to assist him. 

“I now go to the bright realms where ‘sin and sorrow’ are no more, to meet those dear ones who have preceded me there, and who no doubt are even now expecting my coming. 

“Six o’clock p.m

“I have now arranged all my little papers &C: and sealed up my keys for Mr Dare. He will (I trust) attend to my latest requests. The last time I saw him, he said he was engaged that day and the next, to attend the funerals of two friends. I had it on my lips to ask him, would he attend mine for the third. It struck me he would do so. 

“I leave my burial cap ready trimmed on the toilet table. Mrs Cobbin has a long night dress of mine washing, which will answer for my funeral attire. 

C.C.V.G November 21st 1851.

“The black ribbon bracelets are for my wrists.

“I  have now ‘set my house in order’. Into the hands of God I trustfully commit my undying spirit!

“Caroline”

When the perusal of this paper, which was listed to with breathless attention, was finished, Mr Joseph Dare, Domestic Missionary, was examined. His evidence gave fuller detail of the deceased’s proceedings in Leicester than that of the first witness. He said :-

I first became acquainted with the deceased in my official capacity. I knew nothing of her personally. She called at the house the first time yesterday week. She sent me two little poetical compositions, stating herself to be the authoress. I opened them and asked her what price she set upon them, she she said 6d. Each, which I gave her. She used the name of Mr Hollings, in the course of conversation, stating he had given her 5s, and referred her to me. 

I did not see her again until Monday, when I called upon her, having received a not from a benevolent lady, requesting me to examine into her character and circumstances. I called in, in consequence of that note, upon the deceased, and I afterwards informed the lady of the impressions derived from that visit, which were that I did not consider the deceased to be an imposter, though, there being no second party to refer to, it was a difficult thing to come to a decision as to facts. I asked the deceased whether she had any direct jobs in view, as I considered that charity without a feasible purpose, was only a bonus for taendicancy(?). She told me she wished to procure sufficient money to take her to Ireland, where, she said, she thought she should be able to obtain shelter among her father’s former tenants, during the winter. 

I told the Lady of the interview I had had, and, and as there was no immediate reply, the deceased called upon me again, either on the same day or the next (Tuesday) morning. I informed her I had left the case with the lady already mentioned, and gave her a shilling, when she left me. 

I never saw her again. This morning I heard of the decades from a pupil of Mr Buck’s, with a request that I would wait upon him at his house, and I accordingly went and received from Mr Buck three enclosures - the same as those referred to in his evidence. One contains her keys; another a horse-chestnut, with a memorandum on the back “I wish this to be planted at the head of my grave, where it may be. Caroline, Nov 21 1851” and the third packet contains a little arithmetical table book, inside the leaves of which are pinned several pawn-tickets for trifling articles of wearing apparel, and a letter directed to myself - containing directions that I would take charge of her manuscripts, which she wished to be published, together withe other works, in a collected form, a list of which is given in a paper headed “My last wishes”. 

There is also a diary, which commences on the 3rd of November and goes on the the 20th, at which date it is continued in the papers produced by Mr Buck. The diary continues but little else than a record of the fruitless applications to various individuals for assistance, mingled with bitter expressions against what, under her circumstances, she would naturally consider want of feeling (but in which I of course do not concur). She mentions in two places that she had purchased poison, but she does not say what kind, nor where obtained. 

There appears to have been a perpetual dread of starvation upon her mind; but I gather from the diary that she had received twelve shillings within it’s date  5s from Mr Holllings, 5s from the Rev. Mr Harrison and 2s from myself; besides what she had received from the pawning of her clothes, which appears to amount to 13s 6d from the 31st October; so that it appears the dread of want must have arisen from her too sensitive mind. She speaks in very harsh terms, in her diary, of the conduct of her son and her husbands, the last of whom was worse than the first, if possible. There is some allusion, also, to property in Ireland, which she says is in the hands of attorneys, and is therefore unavailable and ever will be so. 

She also mentions in her diary, as she did to me {illegible latin term possibly vied coce} that she received from Sir Robert Peel, when prime minister, the same of £50, and that she had since written to Lady Peel, but had not received an answer. I wish to add that when I first called at her lodgings, she told me that she was induced to come to Leicester to meet a cousin. I think she said who was coming from the West Indies, to take possession of some property near Leicester, connected with the name of Saunders. She did not appear at all a drinking woman, but one of very fined feeling. Her handwriting is of very good character. She never gave me any account where any of her relations now lived. She said she was born in America. She appeared to be about forty years of age. 

At this stage of the inquiry, the Coroner considering it advisable every particle of evidence relating to the case should be collected, directed Sergant Wright, the summoning officer of inquests, to proceed to the bedroom of the deceased, and there examine her boxes, in company with Mr Buck and Mr Dare, in order to see with they might contain. On his return he deposed to the examination of two of the boxes, one of which contained books, manuscripts, drawings, writing paper &c: the other a few articles of wearing apparel and a small work box, locked. “Upon unlocking it,” continued Sergeant Wright, “I found several papers, once of which was a letter addressed to Lady Peel” This the witness handled to the coroner, who read it as follows ; - 

“Mrs. Gilldea presents her most respectful compliments to Lady Peel, begs permission to inclose compose of her last little publications, and most earnestly to solicit her Ladyship’s kind and benevolent patronage for them, as on the sale her present prospects of support completely depend. 

“Mrs Gildldea is the only daughter and sister of two distinguish, but alas! deceased British officers; her property which is situated in unhappy Ireland, has been placed in Chancery for the last eleven years, to liquidate the debts of her late husband. During that period her literary exertions and a few tuitions, have been the sole sources of maintained for herself and her son, as well as for the education of the latter. 

“Her few sounds of saving were all depended last March, in procuring a Bert for her son as midshipman on board a merchant vessel, bound for Port Phillip, as well as his necessary outfit. She has not had any remunerative employment for fifteen months, and is now reduced to the greatest possible distress, not having means of paying for her miserable room (2s 6d per week) fo another week, or of procuring the commonest necessaries of existence. Had it not been for the humanity of the Rev. Mr Harrison (a clergyman here) who gave her five shillings the other day, to pay her rent, {illegible} and supply food for the present, she must have perished. 

“Major Dawson (Mrs Gilldea’s father) was honoured by the private friendship of the late ever-to-be-lamented Sir Robert Peel, from the period of his Secretaryship in Ireland. Sir Robert Peel, to testify to his regard for his memory, was very good, in 1845, to send Mrs Gilldea £50 from the Royal Bounty Fund, as also to take copies of the ‘Banyan’s Pilgrims Progress converted into an Epic Poem’ her ‘Anatomy of the Affections’ &c &c.

“Mrs Gilldea ventures more to inclues the lines on Sir Robert Peel’s death, which she did not dare to do immediately after that sad event, when Lady Peel’s feelings were freshly bleeding from their calamitous wound.

“If Mrs Gilldea had sufficient means to pay her passage to Ireland, and purchase a few necessary clothes (for she posses merely a change of inside clothing not sufficiently warm for this period of the year), she feels not doubt that some of her former tenantry would afford her at least a home for the winter. 

“Poverty is no doubt a very severe visitation, even for those who have always been inured to it; but, or such (as Mrs Gilldea) who have been nurtured in affluence, it become an overwhelming evil which prostrates every energy both of the mind and body. 

“Vainly for the past fifteen months has she sought for a situation as governess, companion, amanuensis, or even as housekeeper; in fact words cannot picture her present desolation and despite. 

“Oh my Lady Peel, with that benevolence for which she is so distinguished, take companion on her wretched state, and like a good angel minster to her relief!

“At Mrs Gobby’s 11 Upper Hill-Street, Leicester, Nov 28th 1851.”

The property of the deceased appeared altogether to be of scarcely any value. 

There being no further evidence in attendance, the Coroner asked the jury whether they wished the case to adjourned, but they seem to think there was no necessity for it. 

The Coroner, in addressing the jury, said that this was one of the most painful and melancholy cases that had ever come under his notice. Distressing, indeed, was it to a person like the deceased, in the prime of life and with so highly endowed a mind, reduced to the lowest state of poverty and coming to so untimely an end. In taking the evidence into their consideration, the jury had two painful points to determine. First, were they satisfied that the deceased had died from the effects of the poison alluded to and if so, was it administered by her own, or by the hand of any other person; and secondly, if they were of the opinion that it was the deceased’s act then, did the evidence enable them to come to a conclusion as to her state of mind at the time. 

The Coroner then, in alluding to the first point, called the attention of the jury to the evidence of Mrs Cobbin, as to the state in which she found the deceased, with the bottle and cup standing within her reach on the table - the evidence of Mr Buck as to the nature of the poison and the result of the post mortem examination - and to the contents of the papers found upon the table. He told the jury that, taking all these circumstances into consideration, he thought that not the slightest doubt existed as to the deceased having died from poison administered by herself. As to the second point, which was frequently attended with some difficulty, the Coroner said that the evidence of Mrs Cobbin did not disclose anything remarkable in the conduct of the deceased, but he thought that the principal piece of evidence upon the subject, was the document produced by Mr Buck, and which had been written by the deceased immediately before taking the poison. Was that such a production as would emanate from a person of sound mind? The Coroner asked the jury whether they would like to heart it again, but they said they did not wish it. 

The Coroner then spoke of the extreme state of destitution to which she had become reduced, and asked the jury whether they thought that that would not have a very powerful effect upon a mind as highly sensitive as the deceased’s appeared to be. If the jury thought that her mind was broken down and overwhelmed by her condition, and that her reason had at the last become temporarily impaired by it, then they would be perfectly justified in coming to a verdict of temporary insanity. 

If on the other hand they thought that the taking the above document and all the previous circumstances of the case into consideration, that the deceased did till the last retain possession of her reasoning faculties, and that her will was perfectly consenting to the act, that it would be their bonnden (?), though he was sure painful duty, to return a verdict of felo de se [suicide]. But lastly, if the jury had doubts upon the subject, and thought that the evidence adduced did not warrant them in coming to a concluding either way, he then advised them to come to a verdict which was now frequently adopted, and which the Coroner believed to be a legal one, namely, that the deceased had died from the effects of poison, but what her state of mind was, at the time she took it, the jury were unable to determine from the insuffiencey of the evidence. The Coroner then said he left the case in the hands of the jury, in the full confidence that it would receive their most attentive and serious consideration. 

The room was then cleared, and the jury, after the lapse of about ten minutes, sent for the Coronor and on his asking the foreman whether they had agreed to their verdict, he said that fourteen out of the fifteen jurymen had agreed to a verdict. "That the deceased poisoned herself when labouring under a temporary fit of meant insanity. “ During the four of five hours over which the examination extended, the jury and all persons present listens with intense attention to the extraordinary details of the case, which transcended in it’s mournful and peculiar character any they had hitherto heard. In fact, we believe the Coronor himself has never had to preside over an investigation to which so much of romantic and painful interest has been attached and which seems to resemble a fiction instead of being an actual occurrence.

The body of the deceased was removed to the dead house in the Cemetery on Sunday afternoon, for the purpose of being visited by any person connected with the family of the deceased, should they hear of her tragic end. We have seen in Mr Dare’s possession a book of paintings of flowers and drawings, all executed by the deceased in a clever style, and proving her to have been highly accomplished. 

In a volume published by the unfortunate lady, entitled ‘The Family Alter’ containing prayers for every day in the week to which are appended (?) or sacred songs is a ‘Private Prayer for a person in a state of poverty’. The following is proposed to be “added when a person is under temptation to self murder”. 

“Let no temptations or trails so far prevail with me as to put an end to my being, but let me consider that I am thy creature, and that thou only hast a right to dispose of my life, and that it is my duty to submit to the greatest troubles with perfect humility and resignation, wen thou sees fit to lay them upon me.”

In a note the following passage occurs : - “the authoress of the ‘Family Alter’ having found the original of this prayer so suited to her own peculiarly painful circumstances, and having derived much comfort and consolation from using it, is induced to insert it, for the benefit of others who may be similarly situations.”
The last poem in the book is

My days of youth and health have flown,
My early friends are all no more,
My ev’ry joy on earth is gone,
Each dream of happiness is o’er,
And dark and simile is my fate - 
I am alone and desolate!

My heart weeps blood, so keen my grief,
I mourn with bitter, voiceless woe,
From earth my soul finds no relief,
And comfort none my griefs can know;
Such is my dreary, sadden’d fate - 
I am alone and desolate!

But though the weary, wounded soul
May feel each earthly pleasure fled,
There no heavenly control,
A balm upon its wounds to shed?
None to assuage its bitter fate? 
None to make glad the desolate? 

Though link by link be torn away,
That formed the strength of friendships chain,
Though love and even hope decay,
And leave behind regret and pain,
Is there no light to dissipate
The gloom which shrouds the desolate? 

Ah, yes! There is a Friend on high,
Whom all may find in time of need;
He hears each suffering spirit’s cry,
And soothings sweet from him proceed;
Though gloomy be the mourners fate,
Though lonely, and though desolate!

‘Mid sin’s frail weakness, sorrow’s blight, 
He still the sadden’d soul will keep,
God is the strength, the joy, the light,
Of all who mourn - of all who weep - 
Of all in high or low estate - 
Of all bereaved and desolate!

He is the Friend who changeth not, 
But ever doth the same remain;
Though sorrow be our earthly lot,
He will our falter steps sustain
With pity doth he view the sate
Of each alone and desolate!

Allmightly Lord, assuage my grief,
A heavenly friend I feel I need,
Grant me, my Saviour, they relief,
Through thee all blessings, good proceed!
No longer sad shall prove my fate,
No longer lone and desolate!